Success!

First and foremost, I successfully tracked every bite last week! I am so proud of myself. It's the first time I tracked 100% in more months than I can count.

For my diligent tracking efforts, I was rewarded with a beautiful 3.2 pound loss this morning! That brings my current weight to 179.5. I am quite happy. I do want to note that I used 47/49 weekly points allowance (WPA.) This week I commit to tracking everything, and focusing on good health guidelines (GHG.)   It's fairly easy for me to achieve all the GHG without much thought, but when life gets busy I will end up missing a dairy or an oil.

In other news, I want to touch on self confidence. I used to severely lack self esteem and confidence. I've wavered back and forth in those departments the last few years. However, I have to say my confidence is at a peak. Despite being at my highest weight, I am in love with my body. There are numerous things that are factoring into my self love:
1) I got a new haircut. A good haircut always makes me feel awesome. I went quite a bit shorter, and I love it. I had planned on going shorter after losing a little weight, but then I realized that was stupid. I have never been one to hide behind baggy clothes, so I shouldn't hide behind my hair.
2) I have been making a conscious effort to leave the house dressed "stylish." Now, I'm not a fashionista by any means. I am just focusing on putting together outfits that are cute and comfortable with great accessories. I have never been one to leave the house in pajamas or workout gear, but I am stepping it up a notch.
3) I am wearing clothes that fit appropriately. Accepting that some of my jeans and shirts were a hair too snug was a hard pill to swallow. Buying a few pieces that fit my current body was worth the money.
4) I realized that when you dress your body in flattering clothes that aren't too big or too small, you look smaller. I have also been paying more attention to other people. My conclusion is that no one really cares and/or notices that you have some arm flab or a slight stomach roll. I wore a sleeveless dress today without a shrug. I held my head high. I even went to the mall and did some window shopping. I felt beautiful and confident!
5) I am definitely not the type to care what anyone else thinks about my looks. Case in point being that I love wearing short hair, and no one will ever discourage me from cutting it all off. I do admit, like a normal human being, my confidence is boosted when the men in my life compliment my looks and my curves. It's just nice to hear that some men prefer thicker thighs and a round butt.
6) I make sure to look at myself in the mirror (naked) each day. This could be a brief look when getting out of the shower, or a prolonged stare while changing clothes. The more I look at my body, the more I accept that it is perfect no matter my size. It will be fun to watch my body change during my weight loss journey.

I think I might become a frequent dress wearer. I used to have a bunch of excuses for hating dresses. It turns out that a well fitting one can make me feel more confident than a shirt and pants.

Here's to feeling fantastic! I'm looking forward to this next week.

Forget the past, it's time for a new beginning!

Today is my fresh start! I have been actively paying for Weight Watchers for eons, but I haven’t actually been following the plan. I think my weight loss mindset has finally returned after a lot of stress the last two years.

I will not dwell on my past weight history today. I want to paint a clear picture of my current life. (Here goes nothing! I’m excited to finally clear the cobwebs from my brain and write. I tend to only think in numbers these days. Please forgive any grammatical errors until I'm back into the swing of things.)

I am now a 25 year old single gal living in Akron, Ohio. I moved to Akron about five days after my last blog post. My move was slightly random, and definitely quick. However, I have grown to love the city. I currently work two jobs. By day, I’m a bank teller for a community bank. By night, I’m a beverage sales specialist in a very eclectic retail store. I work an average of 45 hours a week between the two jobs.

When I moved to Akron, I was near five of my closest friends. Two years later, a couple and I remain. I have been fortunate to make some new friends, but I’m always looking for more. I am having fun dating in the city (which still feels somewhat new to me.)

I travel back to my hometown every few weekends to see my family, whom I adore. It saddens me to say that my mom passed away unexpectedly almost a year ago. My mom’s death has brought our small family even closer together. Two weeks ago we were blessed with an addition to the family! I became a first-time aunt to an adorable nephew.

I spend most of my free time these days reading personal finance blogs, the Weight Watchers message boards, and fiction. I love my Nook! I enjoy cooking more now than ever before. I attribute this to having my own kitchen.

I want to document both my mental and physical transformations. I realize how much I have changed in two years, and I slightly regret not writing about my struggles. I have more positive thoughts than negative these days which is an incredible feeling! I am proud of the fact that I've loosely maintained my weight for nearly four years.

My vision is to (eventually) share some of my past struggles like losing my mom as well as my battle with depression. I look forward to many posts about budget friendly healthy recipes. I may even include the occasional tale of my online dating adventures!

Now it’s time to face the scale! I have been weighing myself weekly for awhile, but I have not been tracking. I have been fairly mindful of my food choices and portions. I know the main reason I haven’t lost weight is because I am guilty of night binges, especially ice cream. I should know by now that I cannot keep it in my apartment. As of this morning, I weigh 182.7 pounds. I am not shocked by this number, but I accept it as a result of my contentedness. I am slightly saddened by the fact that I weigh almost seven pounds more now than when I first joined Weight Watchers on August 14, 2007. While I am sad the number is higher, I realize that I could have done much greater damage in five and a half years. Now it's just time to move forward!

My only goal for this week is to TRACK. I will track every single bite and sip that passes my lips this week. I would love to have a perfect first week on plan, but tracking everything will be a great first step. 

Weigh In Update

My last update I announced a 2 pound loss. I'm a couple weeks behind so the following will show those weeks:

Last posted weigh in 5/17: 173.2 -2.0
                                5/24: 173.0 -0.2
                                5/31: 174.2 +1.2
                                  6/7: 174.0 -0.2

To be totally honest, I didn't fully track after the week of 5/17. I've been hit or miss in the tracking department. The 1.2 pound gain was the week of PMS I had before/during my period. That's a pretty normal reflection for me lately. I have a small gain each month that correlates to my hormones and monthly cycle. Would that gain each month continue if I would commit to 100% tracking? Maybe-maybe not.

Tomorrow is an important day for me. I am going for an appointment with an endocrinologist. I scheduled the appointment over 6 months ago, when my primary care physician said once again that my thyroid levels "look fine." They very well may be fine, but I want a second opinion.

My story began August 14, 2007 when I joined weight watchers at 176.0. Over the course of 7 months, I got down to 140 pounds. I looked great and felt great. Fast forward to May 2009, I had started a course of medications, and hit 171.4 while still following the WW Momentum Plan. Well here I am exactly two years later, and I weigh 174.0. In the last 24 months, my weight has been between 169.0 and 181.4. I have pretty much maintained, with the average of being right at 173.5 pounds.

During the last 2 years, I have found that regardless of being a strict WW or not, I have maintained (in my opinion.) I have other symptoms that lead me to believe that something is wrong. I am anxious to hear what the specialist has to say tomorrow. I may explain things a little further then.

*Note: my last two weigh ins have been on Thursdays because of Tuesday commitments, and I wanted to try a new leader. I don't know what day I will weigh in this week.

And the verdict is...

A 1.6 pound gain! Honestly, I'm ok with it. I weighed in mid-day which may or may not be better than the last 3 evening weigh ins. 
I'm ok with the gain because:
1) It's probably mostly water retention due to high sodium intake the last 2 days.
2) It still wasn't an early morning weigh in.
3) Weighing in and accepting the scale is the lifestyle vs. diet mentality. I very easily could have skipped the scale and let that small gain domino into larger ones.
Oh, how can I forget the funniest/stupidest thing that I now know had to affect the scale:

I realized today that the milk I have been drinking all week and counting as 2 points a cup, is actually 3 points a cup. You're probably wondering how I could not know the points of my milk, right? Well I do know the points of my skim milk! I accidentally bought 1% milk at Wal-Mart and had no clue. See-skim is light blue at Krogers where I usually buy it. Unfortunately, skim at Wal-Mart is pink. It was an honest, but point-costly mistake (I normally pay attention, but I was in a hurry that day.) After quickly looking through my tracker, I figure that I actually ended the week 12-14 points in the hole simply because of the milk mixup. :(

Today starts a new week! :)

Weight Fluctuations - Don't Get Upset

"If you are exercising and eating right, don't be discouraged by a small gain on the scale. Fluctuations are perfectly normal. Expect them to happen and take them in stride. It's a matter of mind over scale." - excerpt from Why the Scale Lies

One great debate in the weight loss world is to weigh (daily) or not to weigh. Of course, most of us want to weigh periodically to track progress. I believe that an official weigh in once a week on the same day each week at approximately the same time of day is the most accurate way to gauge weight loss.

I don't typically get on the scale mid-week. My official Weight Watchers weigh in day is Tuesday. I give it my best effort to stop at the center in the morning before I eat breakfast.
During the week I watch a few tell-tale signs that help keep me off the scale: is my ring easy to spin? how do my pants feel? This week my ring is spinning quite easily and my smallest pair of size 14 dress pants buttoned comfortably. I figured these were good signs for my weigh in tomorrow.

Unfortunately, I decided to sneak a peak at the scale tonight. It's registering me at 179 (and it's faithfully been very close to WW.) I couldn't have gained FIVE pounds of fat in a week. That's impossible...technically to gain 5 pounds I would have had to eat about 129 Reese's Peanut Butter Eggs.
Could I "gain" five pounds from another source? Absolutely! The two leading culprits of weight fluctuations are water retention and timing.

Keep in mind every body is different. I heard WW members all the time say "I don't eat popcorn 2 days before weigh in." or "If I want Chinese food I have to eat it the night after weigh in so I have a week to flush my system." Honestly, I don't go to those extremes. The point is that sodium can cause water retention which in turn shows a "gain" on the scale. Sodium is found in nearly all processed foods - some soft drinks and pudding cups hide more sodium than a handful of salted nuts.

The other reason the scale might be up is timing. Do you normally weigh in in the morning before you eat? In the privacy of your own home without clothes? As I stated before, I weigh in in the morning (usually) in business casual work clothes. Each week I try to wear the same style of outfit and remove my jewelry to get the most accurate weight I can. Time of day, eating or not eating and clothing can all affect the number on the scale.

If I know that I have done my part for the week including tracking, following the good health guidelines and exercise, I don't let the scale bother me. Sometimes life (work) happens and I can't weigh in in the morning. Sometimes my body decides to hold onto water to counterbalance a sodium laden meal. Heck, sometimes I just end up constipated the night before weigh in.

The bottom line is: Our weight fluctuates daily, even hourly. Numerous factors play into it. If you get a number on the scale that isn't quite what you expected, keep your chin up. A little blip on the radar is very minor when you look at the journey as a whole. Try something different the next week; if you ate out the day before your weigh in, try to avoid restaurants a few days prior, or increase your water intake. In the end, I do what I need to do to keep living a happy and healthy lifestyle.

The scale will follow eventually.